Tuesday, May 1, 2018

The House is So Quiet Now

As somebun once wrote, every story has a beginning, a middle and an end.  I never wanted to have to help my baby girl tell the end of her story.  



Our journey together began in a Petsmart store in Plano TX.  I was shopping for cat food on August 13, 2000 and I had no intention of adopting a kitten.  I just happened to walk by the cages that Texas Cares Cat Rescue had set up and saw a teeny terrified kitten huddled in a corner of a cage all alone.  Evidently she was the runt of her litter and she was still waiting to be adopted.  I went to the food aisle and loaded up my cart but found myself back at her cage a second time looking at her scared little face.  I asked if I could hold her.  She trembled uncontrollably in my arms but snuggled close as if she knew we were meant to be.  She started purring and I could not let her go from that very first moment.  Before I knew it I had filled out the paperwork and we were on our way home.  That little girl sure had some lungs on her!  She meowled and hyperventilated the whole way home and it was a sound I would hear for almost 18 years to follow any time I had to take her in the car.



She was named Dinah by the rescue but that sure did not suit her.  I decided to call her Sammie.  As time passed, her name evolved and soon she was known as Sammie Jammie JellyBean.  Her formal name ended up being JellyBean but informally she was always known as JB.  

She was a busy little girl and her high activity level continued on into her later years.  She seemed to always get into some sort of predicament.  There was the time she pretended she had not gone into the fireplace but the black soot on her face gave her away immediately.  
  


Then there was the time when she got caught in the handle of a paper bag.  She freaked out and began to tear around the house in fright, peeing the whole way.  I could not stop laughing which I know was wrong, but from that day on I cut off the handles of every bag that she might get into.  I had to be careful because she was always getting her paws into something. 




















She rarely slept for long periods of time and she was always my shadow, talking to me all the time.  We carried on full conversations back and forth as she meowed a reply to everything I said to her.  She was very busy all day long and kept me up every night.  I really did not sleep for almost 18 years.


JB was not one who liked to be held unless it was on her own terms or if she was ready for a belly snuggle.  If I picked her up, she preferred to climb over my shoulders and ride around the house on my back.  




Her pale crystal blue eyes were mesmerizing to me.  She always looked at me with such love.  She and I were one and she had my heart from the first day I met her. 



JB began her blog in 2008 and she was an early member of the Cat Blogosphere.  She was very paws on when managing blog content.    




Her blog was her first project and it was not till mid 2016 that she became the CFO (Chief Feline Officer) of our new small business, JellyBean Publishing.  Rightly so, our company was named after her and she was a tough boss!  I hope I can make her proud as I carry on her legacy.


Throughout her senior years, JB loved to bring me her favorite mice which were her old red mousies and her other favorite, the Plague Ratsie which is in our shop.  As she proudly carried them in her mouth, she meowled with astonishing volume and pitch for such a tiny kitty.  She transported them up and down the stairs on a daily basis.  Sadly, the last time I think she did this was Feb 17, 2018.  She had many health issues since about 2012 and I started to realize the end was near.



April 26, 2018 was the day I said my final goodbye and it was heart wrenching.  I wondered if I was doing the right thing down to about an hour before the vet came to the house.  I cuddled my tiny 4.4 pound baby girl for a few last minutes and then she laid on my lap for the whole procedure. Tears flowed uncontrollably.  I could not breathe or bear the pain in my heart but I finally knew I had to let her go. 


After JB was gone, I looked at her frail little body on my lap with tears and I kissed her for the last time.  I think I heard a final little meow, "Thank you for being my mom.  I love you.  Thank you for loving me and letting me go."  


The house is so quiet now.  
I will miss you forever, Baby Girl.  Till we meet again.  
Be Safe.  I Love You.  


30 comments:

Brian said...

Such a sweet and loving tribute to your sweetie. We understand, even though there is 7 of us, having lost 2 in the last 6 months is tough. Hugs.

The Island Cats said...

When we started blogging, JB was one of the first kitties we met. We know how much you loved her and how special she was. We wish we had the right words to help your pain and sadness go away...but we don't. We will never forget JB. Sending you lots of comforting purrs.

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Yep!

We know which human is to be ours!

As fur 'the decision' it is hard to know when that time is here but woo done her good as they say -

Here's to Angel JB -

Loved and more!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
PeeEssWoo: and Khyra's mom too

Eileen Ozanick said...

Such a beautiful tribute. I'm sitting here in tears. xo

Helen said...

One of our best blogging buddies. She was a true beauty. Godspeed little girl...

DD Bunz said...

JB was a beautiful cat. She had a wonderful life with you and I'm sure she enjoyed being your boss...lol. I love the tribute. I hope she is with Mister and Ginger Sprite. Thank you for sharing JB with so many of us. Love and hugs. Debbie D.

Amy Kleiner said...

The tears are flowing. What a beautiful blog. My heart is breaking for you.

Just Ducky said...

Me and mum are sorry for your loss. Mum is all leaky eyed right now.

Alasandra, The Cats and Dogs said...

((Hugs)) We will miss JB too. She was one of the first friends we made when we started blogging.

Anonymous said...

JB, Misty, and PooPoo were our first cat blog friends. When you kept commenting on our Hana the Dog blog, we were curious about you. Through you, we came to love cats and we would read your JB's Small World, JB's Big World, and I think there was one more World which I can't remember now. So many years have passed by.

You wrote a beautiful tribute to JB. She was such a beautiful girl. We are very sorry for your loss. She is our loss, too. Thank you for sharing JB with us.

Tears and hugs.

Mickey's Musings said...

We are so happy we had the pleasure of knowing this wonderful kitty even if only through the blogs.
She was a special girl and we know your heart hurts right now.
We send comforting purrs and hugs.
JB was and always be a beautiful and wonderful kitty.We will miss you too JB <3
Purrs Georgia,Julie and JJ
and mum Nancy

Marg said...

That was such a fantastic tribute to JB. Wish I had paid more attention to your blog. She sounds like such a wonderful cat. And just keep in mind, she was such a lucky cat to have had you in her life. She was well loved and that is so important. Sending many hugs.

Ella Walsh said...

A beautiful cat, a beautiful Mama, hold all those memories close. Thanks for sharing so many animal stories. I love you all... Hugs!

The Florida Furkids said...

Beautiful tribute to sweet JB. We will miss her very much.

((((hugs)))

The Florida Furkids and Mom Sharon

Marjorie and Harvey said...

Say here in tears.

What a lovely, beautiful and fun girl JB has been for you.

I am sorry you have lost her. Like many of us I grieve with you.

BeadedTail said...

Such a loving tribute to beautiful JB. She was your heart kitty and she'll remain in your heart forever. She'll be in ours too. Much love and purrs to you. (((hugs)))

Summer said...

We are heartbroken along with you. JB was such a special girl, and the whole Cat Blogosphere will miss her loads.

Tom, Tama-Chan, Sei-Chan, Bibi-Chan, Gen-Chan, Vidock, Violette said...

Thank you for sharing JB's story with us. We loved reading every word and looking at every photo. We are so sorry she has gone, but the words are far too true. There is always an end. We are glad she was able to share your life for so many years, and she will always live on in all our memories. We still think fond;y of all our beloved CB friends who have crossed over the years.

Sending you Purrs and Hugs,
The Chans and #1

Monica Mac said...

Oh CL, my heart breaks, reading your tribute to your beautiful girl. Sending so much love and gentle hugs to you xxx

JB's Big and Small Worlds said...

Thank you so much everyone for your comments. They mean a lot. My Baby Girl will be home this morning. More tears to come. I miss her so much...

Nanük said...

Soft woooooos,

NukNuk

The Church Cat Family said...

All those years together, you knew each other's heart. We'll all miss you Jb. -Tom, Mom Julie and Bridget

pilch92 15andmeowing said...

I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful girl. XO

Dennis the Vizsla said...

hello jbs mama its dennis the vizsla dog hay i am verry sorry to heer that jb had to go away run free over the rainbo bridj jb chaysing butterflies and moths thru the soft grass!!! i am sending lots of vizsla tail wags and the hipster kitties send purrs!!! ok bye

Elizabeth Munroz said...

May the memories bring you some comfort as your heart deals with her loss. Hugs and Purrs <3

Jans Funny Farm said...

such a personality and what wonderful memories! so very sorry for the loss of your beloved JB. Hugs from all of us.

meowmeowmans said...

Such a loving tribute to your beautiful, beloved JB. What an amazing kitty she was, and what a special love the two of you shared. Sending you love and gentle purrs of comfort.

Kevin, Tracey, Gracie and Ava

Katie Isabella said...

I understand the pain and grief as do all of us in the CB. I have very leaky eyes reading about her. Please accept my heartfelt condolences and hugs. I am so sorry for your loss.

Danielle S. said...

It's always so hard to say goodbye, but I am glad you got to share so much love and so many years with JB ❤

da tabbies o trout towne said...

What a beautiful tribute to your beautiful girl. We are very sorry and understand how hard this is. sending hugs and loves from dai$y, tuna, dude, boomer and sauce ♥♥♥♥♥